Articles I wrote for The Cheese Grater Magazine

The UCL Union The Cheese Grater Magazine follows the format set out by Private Eye and the like, containing investigative journalism, humour articles and cartoons. I was with the magazine for three years, December 2006 - December 2009, and I was the Investigations Editor for two of those years. While some of The Cheese Grater's humour was dark, disturbing or downright weird, there was also some brilliant stuff, and I was very happy to provide a lot of their investigative content during that time.

Below is a summary of my contributions - I've also uploaded full copies of the articles.



Issue 11
- Scolarest 
Investigation: "College has handed the Refectory on a plate to a company with a reputation almost as bad as its food. Alex Ashman investigates exactly why high prices and bad sandwiches are just the start..."

Issue 12
- Arms shares
Special report: "By investing arms companies, UCL is dealing in death and destruction. Alex Ashman explains why this isn’t right and more importantly, why it isn’t necessary"

- Embittered economist ruins AGM
Union affairs story: "One man was able to prevent the discussion of some vital issues at the AGM this year and it appears it was all because he couldn’t quite accept defeat..."

Issue 14
- Arms shares follow-up
Investigation: "As College meddles with Union in order to prevent publicity of the progress of the Disarm UCL campaign and a proposed working group on ethical investment remains inactive, UCL is no closer to shirking arms companies writes Alex Ashman"

Issue 15
- Bad science/junk medicine
Investigation: "Why exactly did UCL, a leader in scientific research, bow to the wills of two crackpot herbalists?"

Issue 16
- Asbestos
Investigation "UCL has known about the asbestos lying across college for over ten years. So why hasn’t it been removed yet?"

Issue 17
- Arms shares short (Lies, damned lies and press releases)
"UCL’s press department hopes that a little bull**** will help the medicine go down."

- Room bookings short (Darwin LT booked for anti-evolution group)
"Either someone at room bookings lost their common sense, or perhaps they just fancied a giggle... Alex Ashman reports"

- Bursaries short (UCL fails to pay out hundreds of bursaries)
The Cheese Grater reveals information that UCL refused to release to national papers.

Issue 18
- Sanctuary newspaper
"Banned paper tries (and fails) to stake a claim on Union turf."

Issue 19
- UCL City Academy
Investigation: "Parent protests, student opposition and now a humiliating High Court review. Is Malcolm Grant’s city academy a shameless PR stunt gone badly wrong?"

Issue 20
- Arms shares follow-up
"Student campaigners are celebrating but UCL’s new ethical investment policy is predictably disappointing."

Issue 21
- UCL - London’s Pan-Galactic University
Surprisingly successful pastiche of the opening chapter of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, with Boris Johnson arriving to knock down Malcolm Grant's university.

- The Plight of the PGTA
Investigation: "The exploitation of Postgraduate Teaching Assistants at UCL is bad news for their research and the undergraduates they teach."

Fresher's Issue 2009
- Follow-ups on previous stories

Issue 22
- Down Your Union column
Regular feature: "Fees, cuts, racism, blueprints and boredom: The Cheese Grater looks into this year’s Welcome General Meeting"

- 'Cuts Like A Knife' - Staff redundancies
Investigation: "Alex Ashman reviews the Provost’s latest slasher"

- Email outsourcing
Investigation: "UCL’s quick-fix Microsoft contract has shored up some gaping holes in college."

- 'Drug driving - your eyes will give you away'
I had the idea for this mock-up of an advert from the Met, featuring a wide-eyed Moomin.

Issue 23

- Down Your Union column
Regular feature: "While Andrew Caddy blows his democracy wad over a tight Council membership, Mandy manhandles the London Living Wage."

- Staff redundancies follow-up
"Exposed: more details on the funding crisis at College"